Three Random Thoughts

1.) I get medz in real life today! These will either calm me down or make me want to kill everyone. 8D

2.) When you read a blog with a team of writers (beyond one where they're multiple personalities like here), posting that you like A better than another team member on B's post is !@#$ing rude. You should be stabbed in the eye with a spork.

3.) I want to hunt down whoever thought Bert and Ernie were gay room mates, rip our their genitals and shove them down his/her throat. Sesame Street was designed so that the characters acted like their audience members, which are infants up through early/middle elementary school. Guess what? I took baths with my little brother at that age, and it certainly wasn't !@#$ing incest! Some families bathe same-sex friends together at that age, too. I think my mom had to do that a few times with the younger boys in her daycare because they would get caked in mud. Bert and Ernie are friends, not lovers. They related to 5 year-olds, not adult San Franciscan residents.

Trodden Dirt Road

Highlight if you really want to read. It's just me venting. :P

EDIT: I love my boyfriend. I am incredibly blessed to have someone so caring to not only protect me, but speak for me. Thank you, so much darling, for not only listening but doing what you can.

And thank you to the awesome people out there. I got my pat on the back that I wanted. <3 <3 <3


I have to wonder how many other people struggle with asserting themselves and not wanting to look like they're attention-seeking. Right not, I'm struggling to get over a sinking feeling in my chest because I feel like I've been looked over for my efforts (which I also feel happens often).

I don't mind that my ideas were used so much as I mind not being mentioned in the end. This stems recently from two places, and I'd rather keep it as general as possible. I really don't want to cause drama, as the individuals involved are very sweet, well-meaning people and I think highly of them. (Maybe that's why this feels so heavy, because of the value I give them.) The first, the main individual gave me credit once, but then subsequent parties did not give me any credit. Granted, I found it kind of amusing, because people basically posed themselves unnaturally and anyone reading it would find it strange.

However, the second turned into a competition I never intended. I honestly just wanted to see people's skills. Granted, I was once again mentioned in the very beginning, but the final hurrah really left me... well, with the upset stomach I have now. Maybe it's the manners that have been drilled into me, or the TV specials I've seen, but I thought the closing would have a final reflection on all things that made it possible. I don't care if I wasn't the one that stood out, but...

Well, to be blunt, it was my damn idea.

And somedays, that's all I have. Ideas. They're what have kept me company so many years when my peers shunned me. They're what make me who I am. So, it's not that I've been stabbed through the heart so much as a cannonball has been shot through my torso at this point.

If people read this, again, it's me venting. I'd don't want anyone to be unrecognized, I don't want a huge campaign. The only thing I would want is a pat on the back.

Surrounded by Others' Mistakes

Some days I wonder if it's really worth bothering helping people, or even trying to make friends. I'm typically used to making my own mistakes when interacting with people...

But I'm fucking sick of being treated like dirt because someone else decided to be a bonehead.

It's incredibly draining and disheartening. Sometimes, I want to just runaway and cry; others, I want to just beat the living daylights out of people and then say, "There, now you have an actual reason to think I'm shitty." I understand being cautious, but completely disregarding, ignoring, and/or assuming that I'm going to be exactly like the last person or group is bullshit. Especially after I've repeatedly given my own time, efforts, and money to something. Moreso if you've asked for my help or my partner's help and then utterly blow it off.

I'm particularly peeved by a bunch of people who should be acting like adults, but are acting more like pre-teen brats who 'borrowed' daddy's wallet to get a bunch of stuff and now, instead of addressing the charges they've made, they're just buying more shit. They've made a mess with their toys and make-up, and they don't want to clean it up- only to smear it around more.

I left one place because I wasn't listened to. I'll leave again without looking back, and trust me, the people and things that I've brought to the table will probably bow-out, too.

FlickR - The Epic Sage of Irritation

Night Elf Mohawk III - Frostshock This
Originally uploaded by Green Dream

From GreenD:

[Official Topic] Group Administration Changes

Hi there-

With the launch of Video on Flickr, there are some changes on how you can administer your group, and decide what content you would like to be able to have in the pool. If you have questions about how this will work, please post away!

Revised FAQ on group administration

What they're not telling you is all the group shave been set so that only "safe" content is added to groups until Admins are made aware.

Again, no heads-up. I am looking for a new place to post my stuff. XP

NO! THE SAFETY SEARCH IS OUT TO GET ME!

Silent Sparrow Unseelie and Seelie Contest II - Chase Scene
Originally uploaded by Green Dream

From Green:
Err, yeah... Once again, FlickR is annoying me. First it was the whole "unsafe account" rating, now even I set something to moderate, so many groups automatically will not allow it in. :|

I guess this is what I get for using a public area. I should try using deviantART again. I may or may not revive my old account; we'll see.

Silent Sparrow Unseelie and Seelie Contest I - In the Palm of Your Hand
Originally uploaded by Green Dream

And here is the little naked fairy that is causing me grief. As you can see, nothing is actually showing, but it's clear she's naked. Nifty optical illusion though, huh? No actual photoshopping beyond resizing and cropping. The wings are by Jen Shikami of Seven's Selections, and not only does she have beautiful quality, but there is a wide variety and many different options. There are realistic wings (for the feathered and membraned), fanciful (using fish fins for flight), and mindblowing (ranging from neon-luminescent to steel blades to steam-punk). I hope to do a more thorough review in the future, as a mini-rant post is just not the place. :P

Edit: I have found a way around things, but I'm keeping my lips closed. Yes, things are still moderate. And yes, I'm still unhappy with FlickR.